Saturday, March 1, 2008

Carry on, my wayward son...

What a week. A week to end all weeks. Kole finally caught the cold crud that we were hoping he would avoid, but he's better now. That being said, he has decided to go on a rampage of bad behavior that makes King Kong look like Snuggles. In the course of a week, Megan and I have experienced a degree of defiance and craziness from him that neither one of us have seen before. He has knocked his tv off its stand, knocked his lamp over, consumed marbles (which is amazing..Kole won't even eat sloppy joes or anything with gravy on it) and the coup de grace: climbed up his chest of drawers, toppling his turtle tank and the ant farm sitting next to it. By The Grace of God, he was not seriously harmed (minor cuts on his fingers), but Megan and I were needless to say, a bit rattled after plucking him out of a pile of shattered glass, turtle-tainted water, gravel, and drowning ants. Teeny Tiny Tim (The turtle formally known as Kole's) did indeed survive the ordeal, but has been whisked away to an undisclosed location (Nana's House) to convalesce and recover from post-traumatic stress disorder before being enrolled into the second grade at Blackshere Elementary School in Mannington. God Speed, Tiny Tim. Be cool and stay in school. Study hard and make us proud.

Now, I'm putting a somewhat humorous spin on a series of events that have left us stressed, exhausted, praying, thankful (that Kole wasn't injured more severely) and in tears (not necessarily in that order). Since then, our lives have been filled with two hour, screaming and crying "time outs", behavior progression charts "now, you get a smiley sticker for going to bed and a frowny face if you whine" and Kole's room has been cleared of all...well, everything...except books and a bed. It is lock-down at Windridge Manor, and we're trying to progress with wisdom, consistency, and patience.

Megan and I, being two very distinct personalities save for our unending stubbornness, have ironically dealt with this situation with much the same kind of emotion and reaction. Nothing makes you feel like more of a failure than your misbehaving child. I feel horrible, because I am the newest addition to the scene, and thus feel a great deal of responsibility, while she feels horrible because she's always been on the scene and can't figure out where this is coming from. But, we keep communicating about it and personal feelings aside, this truly isn't about us. This is about Kole. I want nothing more for him than for him to grow into a decent, caring, Christian man. A better man than I have ever or could ever be. I long for him to have the kind of love and guidance Megan and I had as kids, and far richer life experience than either one of us have ever had. I hope that with love, time, and prayer, we can get where we need to be. But right now, it feels like we're crawling through a marathon (if you haven't gotten the hint yet, please feel free to send some prayers our way). But we are trudging through, ever the stubborn trio of misfits.

Out of all of this, however, have sprung some good things for me. Some "silver linings" per se. I first will say publicly, that Megan is an amazing woman and wonderful mother. I would have never had the strength, selflessness, and presence of mind to have done as good a job raising Kole as she's done up to this point on her own. I think it's a testament to her character, her strength, and her sheer will that she hasn't mentally crumbled before now. She is a guide to me in how I should parent, and a constant supporter of my place in this situation. I waited a very long time to get married (I am a fresh, precocious 34), and it is precisely for this reason: I have waited my entire life to marry a woman like Megan. She was well worth the long trek of crappy, confusing relationships and more than worth the wait. My love has waited a long time for a place to land, and it couldn't have landed in a finer spot than Ms. Haugh.

I have responded to the stress of the week's events in an extremely forward-thinking manner that befits my advanced age: I spent a bunch of money. We are now officially owners of an X-Box 360, and 4 games: Call of Duty 4, Modern Warfare (mine), Cars, Maternational (Koleman's), Sonic the Hedgehog, and American Idol (Both Megan's). We're not obsessed yet, but it's giving us something we can do as a family during bad weather that's a little different. I went looking for a Wii (and still want one) but got the X-Box 360 anyway. To balance out the laziness of sitting on the couch and executing precise, military, special operations missions all over the virtual globe, I have also order the workout package P90X. I used to work out pretty vigorously via running and weights, but life, love, and work have conspired to make me more sedentary than I've been in some time. I was not blessed with the genes of Megan's family in that I cannot eat all the time and still remain trim, so lest I turn into "Oh, look at Megan's new husband..he's so cute...he's like a little bowling ball with a beard!", I need to take matters into my own hands and start up again. The premise behind P90X is "muscle confusion". Lots of different routines that keep your muscles shocked and your brain from being bored. The success stories I've seen have been very impressive, so we'll see. I'm not afraid to work out hard, and never have been, and I hope this is a routine I can stick to. Perhaps I'll take some "before" and "after" pictures. We need some new photos for this year's Christmas card anyway.

Over and out....

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your post so much, partly because of your humor, and mostly because of the really great things you had to say about Megan. She is pretty great I'll have to say. Hang in there! Kole is a challenge, but he's so cool and well worth the effort don't you think? Good luck with the training, both yours and Kole's.

Tiffany Rose said...

what sweet things you had to say about my sister! :) I'm so excited to have you as a new "brother"... oh and I feel the same way about my family and how they can all eat anything they want and stay thin!! Why didn't i get that gene?
Also, let me say that I'm so thankful that you are there with Meg during this stressful time. I can't imagine her going through it by herself!
oh and you should keep his marbles in gravy, then he won't eat them!
And James is using a different workout program. The equipment thingy he's using is called a TRX. He's so excited to come home so I can be his work out partner.... great.

Megan said...

Wow honey! Those were some nice things you said about me! Thank you=). I think you are pretty amazing as well. There IS a purpose to this craziness we call life. We can look back and see some of it. I am sure in a few years we will look back and see the purpose of the current chaos. Love you so much!

tiffibug said...

You are so sweet. You know, it made me cry. Poor Tiny Tim. Seriously though, I think it is wonderful that you have finally found love. You're both lucky to have each other.

Anonymous said...

Hi Zach Brown. Kevin told me about your blog and I absolutely loved this post!! I laughed so hard I cried, and I read it out loud to the rest of my family. I cried tears of laughter, but also because of your kind words about Megan. She is such a wonderful mom, and you two are so blessed to have found each other. And Kole is so blessed to be able to have such a loving, caring dad as you!

You three need to come visit us in Massachusetts some time.